Saturday, April 7, 2007

Me being depressed

I know that this is a delay post.

This is what happened in my life, approximately 2-3 weeks ago when I was still a student.
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Now, I am going through a totally different phrase in my life, a phrase which I am not keen to look forward anymore.

I used to dream big and look forward the kinda life that I always wanted to achieved.A dream that every girl is crazy for. I used to dreamt that I wanted to start my own family after I am done with studies.I admit, I am a family type of person.Nothing comes between me except for my family and beloved one.
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You know, sometimes dream is not something which you can chase after or achieve in reality.(All the time)When I have nothing to dream for anything, my life is just like the flying kite.I didn't allowed myself to determine my life but I allowed actually my life to determine where I want to go.
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Last Friday on my way back from Penang, that was the longest journey ever back home in my life. It took me 7 damn hours to reach KL and I swear to god, the particular journey signified something to me.

Life is a journey and no one can assume where all of us are heading to, just like my bus journey. For the first time ever, I have no clues where the bus heading to although the destinated place its written clearly in my ticket. What come across my mind was, "This journey is definitely a long and miserable one". The fucking bus stopped at this place called Slim River and I have no idea where the hell on earth I was for 40 minutes.Hell yeah!

And then the journey continued and I hated it so much when loneliness filled up the empty space in me when I was at the lowest point in my life. All I remember was, " I know the journey a head of me is way too bumpy and tough, and there is not way I could do it all alone".

Now I am feeling angry. I have what it takes for a depressed person.

I wish I could turn back time. I miss being a student. And i miss ADWAVE and Mass Communication Night.
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(Retro Revisited Night)

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I wish that I could reverse the clock. At least 2 years back.

1 comment:

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